Mid-Life Cycling

Mid-Life Cycling

14 April 2013

Bicycles: Food For Thought

Some years ago, Santa left a package of this in my Christmas stocking:






It was actually very good pasta.  If I recall correctly, it was made in Italy.  At any rate, it came in the trecolori of verte, blanco e rosso.  As much of a Francophile as I am, I'm not so sure that I would have wanted pasta en bleu.


I have seen cookies and other foods--usually sweets--shaped like bicycles.  I can easily imagine cutting vegetables and fruits and forming the pieces into two-wheeled crudites.  However, I have a harder time seeing meat, fish or fowl as velocipedic viandes.


All of this begs a question:  Has anyone ever eaten an actual bicycle?


One Michel Lotito--a Grenoble native who performed under the name "Monsieur Mangetout"-- would have answered, "Moi!"


The best part is that he ate not one, but eighteen, bicycles during his lifetime.  Apparently, it was his favorite non-food delicacy:  He also consumed fifteen shopping carts, seven televisions, six chandeliers and one Cessna 150 aircraft, among other objects you won't find on the menus of restaurants in his hometown. (I know: I've been there!)


Before partaking of his meals, he cut the objects into pieces and, when necessary, ground up the parts.  I don't know whether or not he said grace, but he did gulp some mineral oil before downing his repasts, and drank water throughout each "course".  If you ask me, his exploits give new meaning to the term "slider".


He claimed never to have suffered any ill effects from his galvanized gourmandizing, even though he consumed some substances that are considered poisonous.  He also said he never had trouble passing any of the estimated nine tons of metal he ingested between 1959 and 1997.  No Montezuma's  Revenge for him.  However, he also said that bananas and hard-boiled eggs made him sick.


On 25 June 2007, ten days after he turned 57, he died "of natural causes".


All of this, of course, begs another question:  Did he ever eat a carbon fiber bike?  If so, did its fiber content aid his digestion?


4 comments:

  1. He sounds like an interesting person. Too bad he died so young.

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  2. I was given that same pasta as a Christmas gift a couple of years ago.

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  3. Don't old televisions contain mercury?

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  4. Betty--I would have liked to meet him. I'd love to know how he came upon his metier of eating the inedible.

    Randy--Not a bad little gift, eh?

    Steve--I believe you're right. However, I don't know when televisions became mercury-free. Perhaps he didn't start indulging in 'boob tubes' until then. Or, it could be that he consumed the mercury and, as he claimed about the other stuff he downed, the mineral oil protected his stomach and the water he drank during his meals caused him to pass it quickly.

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