I'll admit: I wasn't always the best kid in the world. I certainly wasn't the most obedient. (Confession: I still take some pride in that!) Then again, as a rabbi pointed out to me, "The Fifth Commandment says, 'Honor thy mother and father.' It doesn't say 'obey'."
(Both images are from Eleanor's NYC.)
Of course, that rabbi wasn't saying that I, or anyone else, should be a defiant child. But he emphasized honor. And, well, I can say I've tried to do that. Really, I have.
The thing is, my mother knows that. She knows now that even when I've done things she wished I hadn't, I wasn't trying to hurt or dishonor, let alone disrespect, her. She knows there are some things I could only but do. And she has supported me in what I needed to do.
Does she realize that I see cycling as one of those things I need to do? Possibly: She has encouraged me to do it, whether or not I needed encouraging. (She has never been a cyclist herself.) And, in the other things in which I needed encouragement--especially the biggest change I ever made--she has stood with me when others wouldn't.
My mother doesn't do computers, and probably never will. However, my father might be reading this. If he is, he will probably show it to her. So, Mom: Happy Mother's Day. And thank you.
(Both images are from Eleanor's NYC.)
My mother was pretty rubbish, not sure why she had kids...
ReplyDeleteOnce, and only once did she ride with me. The only time she ever rode a bike to my knowledge, she suggested that she borrow one of my sisters bikes and we go out together. We rode out past the housing, through the golf course then the woods until we came to a freshly mown field of hay where we lay down and chatted in the sunshine. Just about the only time we ever had anything like a one to one chat too! This short glimpse of what life could be like with parents who cared made the rest of the time even worse. Mothers are not all to be praised or honoured...
Coline--I'm sorry you had such a relationship with your mother. I agree that not all mothers are to be praised or honoured. Trust me: I have known and worked with some of their offspring and, in a few cases, the mothers themselves.
ReplyDeleteI've been lucky in my relationship with my mother, I guess.