26 March 2016

It's A Mountain Bike....And A Weight Trainer.

Yesterday, dear reader, I subjected you to another one of my "I remember when" posts.  If I do say so myself, I suspect some of you may have liked it, as the thing I was remembering is the sort of bike that's, sadly, not made anymore.

Today's post will also begin with "I remember when".  What am I recalling from the good ol' days?  Listening to a song with the lyric "all of the colors of black" with rainbows of polyester all around me?  Hearing Bruce Springsteen before the rest of the world would hear of him?  (Yes, I did!)  Seeing Michael Jackson when he was still black?  


No, I'll tell you about something that, if you're not of a certain age, you will find truly incredible.  No, I'm not talking about a time when the Rolling Stones and Joni Mitchell were actually worth listening to.  (Believe me:  There was such a time!)   I'm also not talking about the Knicks winning the NBA Championship. (Yo lo vi, I swear!)  Instead, I'm about to tell you something you may find even more unbelievable.  But I swear it's true.


Here goes:  Saturday Night Live was once actually worth watching. In fact, it was the funniest, and simply the best, program on TV for a time.  Really, it was.  In those days, it offered skits like this:




It's a dessert topping.  No, it's a floor wax.  Dan Ackyroyd, Gilda Radner and Chevy Chase were parodying all of those products hawked on late-night TV that try to serve disparate functions.  Can you imagine what the original SNL cast would have done with smart phones when they first came out?


Now, I'm not against products that can perform more than one function or task.   But just about every product has at least one thing it should never, ever be made to do.  As an example, I don't see how any device could be a juicer and a deep fryer at the same time.  At least, I don't think I'd want to eat or drink anything that came from such a device.


I have seen bicycles used to generate power for hair dryers and laptops, or spin grinding stones used to sharpen knives and cut keys.  I have even seen them used as amphibious vehicles.  I don't mind such uses; in fact, I applaud them.


But I don't think I like this:



If the bars and stem can flex enough to double as a gym machine for upper-body workouts, I'm not sure I'd want to ride them. And, really, you have to wonder just how good of a workout someone would get---whether in the upper body or legs--from the Revolution.


6 comments:

  1. "Subject" us to whatever your heart desires, Justine. Your things are getting remarkable.

    Maybe the Revolution bike is a multitasking machine in other ways: it will land you in a ditch, a snowbank, a haystack, over a fence, or any other place you don't want to go, and you don't even have to choose.

    Leo

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  2. Leo--(She blushes.) Thank you. I love what you wrote in your second sentence: I wish I'd thought of it!

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  3. Another Hardley-Worthit production. From the people who brought you the Bassamatic 76. heehee

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  4. Phillip--Ah, yes, the Bass-O-Matic. Didn't you just love that shot of Laraine Newman drinking the concoction Dan Ackyroyd made?

    I am so disappointed I didn't get a Bass-O-Matic for my high school graduation. Instead, I got a Texas Instruments digital watch!

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  5. What's silver and red and goes round and round? Why a fish in a blender of course. OK, I'll stop now. Hey that TI watch was the shizz back then. Was it the one with the teeny weeny calculator on board?

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